Zanian POV
‘well I’m screwed.’ Even if I didn’t want Crystal there is no way in hell that I can leave her now. So I’ll just have to make this work to the best of my ability.
Blaze is still asleep and it’s been hours. It feels strange not having him give comments or rolling his eyes at me.
My heart breaks for Crystal because she has spent her whole life thinking she was unloved and thrown away. At least I still had my mother to talk to or go to when I had a problem. She had no one, and now the one who saved her is dying.
I watched as she laid her forehead against his and closed her eyes. I wish I could see what she saw because she had a slow smile on her face before she began crying silently. She was just standing there with her eyes closed as if she never wanted to open them again.
I wanted to get up when I saw her pull away, but Donovan motioned for me to stay seated, so I did.
I saw him hesitating before he put his arm around Crystal and pulled her in for a hug. She was reluctant at first, almost scared and clueless, but then she hugged him back and I could feel every emotion she felt through the mate bond.
I sat there feeling left out and a bit out of place, because never before have I felt anything like this. And definitely not from her. I could feel the pain, the anger, the sadness and every small emotion in between. I watched as she drew away from Donovan and listened.
To say I was shocked would be an understatement. If ever I thought about leaving Crystal, that thought has died right here and now.
Suddenly something made sense. ‘when Crystal left me I felt like I was losing my mind. I was feeling weak although I slept enough and Blaze was quiet most of the time and I hadn’t shifted once since she left.’ looking at Donovan with interest I blinked and had to look again. He aged about 10-15 years in a matter of seconds, and then he said the words I had wished my father had said, even if it was only once.
I felt confusion before all I could feel was pain and anger.
As I looked at Crystal cradling her dying father’s head in her hands, just sitting there motionless, I could kill every wolf and person that caused her this kind of pain.
I slowly walked over to her and laid a hand on her shoulder. “Crystal, what do you want to do?” I asked in the softest voice I could master. I know I am a di*k, but I couldn’t bring myself to be anything but sincere. She looked up at me and I saw nothing, absolutely nothing, but anger visible in her eyes.
Her eyes looked dead and hard as stone carved from the deepest bluest ocean cloaked with anger. She looked away from me and just stared at the wall.
I was feeling out of place and the space seemed very small and getting smaller.
Crystal POV
Sitting and holding the body of your estranged dead father was never part of my plan, but you can never really choose, can you?
I don’t know how to feel or what to do. Going over his memories in my head, I feel like I’ve known him my whole life. When he first held me, the way he took care of my mother when she was pregnant. The memories is all I will ever have.
*I’m sorry C.* Raven said and the Sincerity in her voice brought tears to my eyes.
Looking at the wall, I can feel Zanian lingering and he really does look out of place. I stood up and picked my father’s body up.
Zanian went to the door and I made my way out of the house. In his memories I saw this little garden that he spent most of his time in, and that is where I will lay him to rest.
“what happened?” I heard Zara asking as she came running up to us. I ignored her and kept walking, not feeling like talking to anyone.
I try to tell myself that it wasn’t my fault, that none of this is my fault, but somehow I can’t quite convince myself. If only I had known about him sooner, we could have had more time together.
As I retraced the steps of the unfamiliar yet familiar path, I spotted a small green house in the far distance.
Every side is covered with lilies, lavender and other wild flowers. I remember my father telling my mother that she smelled like lavender and earth after heavy rain. And when I was born, I smelled like lilies before he injected me, and my scent changed.
“Crystal, are you sure you want to put him here?” Zara asked from beside me.
I looked over at her and said, “this was his favorite place, and this is where I will bury him. Where is Tracy?”
Zara nodded her head and gave me a sad smile. “ She went hunting.”
“ We will wait for her, so that she can say goodbye before we bury him.” I said and laid the body gently on the ground.
Zanian stepped up to me and put a hand on my shoulder. “ I am sorry Crystal.”
“I know, and thank you.”
I don’t know what to say or think about Zanian. The one minute he is warming and the next he is cold. I should be used to it by now, but I don’t think I will ever be used to his cold treatment, and if what my father said is true, then I have to put steel around my heart and raise my walls.
The sun was high in the sky as we sat there waiting for Tracy to come back and find us. Zara said she would wait at the house for Tracy to come and give her the news. So now it is just Zanian and me.
“ Why didn’t you tell me you knew who I am?” Zanian asked. I looked at him and all I could see was how I tare his eyes out and strangle him. Why does he always do that? It’s like he has no feelings at all. My father whom I just met died and here he is thinking about himself. I mean how much more selfish can a person get.
* He doesn’t know any better C. Give him a chance and you’ll see maybe he can change.*
I scoffed at Raven but Zanian got the message and moved away from me.
I have absolutely no idea what to do from here, and where to go with all this information. If what he said is true and I know it is, why would the King and Queen lie about what happened and why would they kill everyone who ever knew the truth?
“ Why do you think the King and Queen would lie?” I asked Zanian, standing up from the ground.
He looked like he was thinking because he had this expression. He would wiggle his nose and rub over his beard which had been growing for the last few days. And I must say, he looks better with a beard than without one. It makes his cheekbones stand out more and it makes him look more mature. He looked at me and said, “I don’t know Crystal, but we are going to find out. As many questions as you might have, trust me, I have some of my own.”
Before I could answer, I heard footsteps and soon after I heard crying, I walked closer to where the sounds came from and saw Zara walking over there with a crying Tracy. I know this might be inappropriate, but remind me to ask Tracy how old she is. I mentally reminded myself. Tracy knelt down next to Donovan’s body, falling over him while crying her heart out. He said she was special to him and could be of use to us.
She looked at me and before I could even blink she was in front of me throwing her arms around me, still crying. I put my arms around her and hugged her back while rubbing her back.
“ He was all I had.” She said in between sobs and hiccups.
“shhh, it’s okay Tracy. You will have a home with us. And we will be more than happy to make you part of our pack. Besides, we will need all the help we can get.”
I said, and it felt like I was cooing a child. She looked at me and said “I will help with anything.”
Third person POV
Zara, Crystal, Zanian and Tracy stood around Donovan’s body and watched as Tracy started a fire with her hands and set the body alight.
Everyone said a short goodbye and they made their way towards the house again. Tracy went for a shower. Zara left, not telling where she was going. Crystal knows she and Zanian have a lot to talk about but she doesn’t feel like talking, but she also doesn’t want to be alone. “Zanian, can I ask you something? And you don’t need to, but I would like it if you would.” Crystal felt frustrated because she was never one for small talk and here she is, she couldn’t even ask a simple question without feeling silly. Zanian walked up to her and put a hand on her shoulder, spinning her around to face him before he pulled her in for a hug. He put his arms around her, making her feel secure and wanted, but Crystal didn’t know for how long. “I will hold you for tonight and then tomorrow we go home and talk and from there we will decide and figure out what to do and how we are going to go about this.” Zanian said and all Crystal could do was nod her head and lean her body into his.
Zanian took her up to a room with a double bed. He looked at the bed and then at Crystal. “ You know there is a reason why wolves have Queen-size and King-sized beds. So this will be a tight fit.”
Crystal swallowed and licked her lips as she followed every movement Zanian made. She walked closer to the bed and asked “what side are you taking?”
Zanian looked at her and gave one of his long smiles, raveling in the fact that he had got her all chocked up. “I will sleep wherever you want me” Zanian said and winked at Crystal, watching as her throat worked trying to swallow, and the tip of her ears started getting red.
“have you even shared a bed with someone?” Zanian asked and he was starting to sound Cocky again. Crystal took one look at him and said, “I don’t have time for this. Call me when you’re mood swings are over.” And she started walking towards the door.
Zanian had a decision to make and he made his decision before she reached the door.
With one hand resting on the doorknob and the other against the wall, Crystal started opening the door when she felt Zanian’s hand on her wrist.
“I’m sorry. Please don’t go.” He asked and he truly sounded sincere. Crystal turned around and before she could say anything or do anything, Zanian closed the door and backed her up against it, claiming her lips with his in a needy, sloppy kiss. Crystal was shocked for a second before she pushed Zanian away, ignoring her body’s protest and the sparks. “ What are you doing, Zanian?” she asked, and tried stepping around him, but all that got her was a growl that sent shivers down her spine. “I am done playing Games Crystal, so either you want me or you don’t but I want you. I have wanted you since the very first day I saw you, and then again when you came into my office wearing that little black dress. I have seen and imagined many ways of how I wanted to rip it off and bend you over my desk. When I saw you walking away from me that day, I woke up, I saw my whole life leaving and I felt empty and alone. I realized that the only one who can fix me is you, so please. Help me understand what it feels like to feel love without being afraid to lose it.” Crystal was still trying to recover from the shock and realized that would have to wait when Zanian’s lips came down on her again and this time she didn’t protest.
Pls Roxy tell us again that she doesn’t need this asshole.