Neron stared at me with unmoving eyes, like a museum statue, but I didn’t miss the growing fire in his darkening cobalts. Every second that passed felt like an eternity, and my body was falling into the urge to run away. After an agonizing minute, I couldn’t take it anymore and rose out of my seat to—
“Sit, Kiya.”
That simple command stoked the flame burning in my belly. My body, as if it was controlled by an invisible puppeteer, obeyed his order, and found its place back in the chair. Dryness dominated my throat as my eyes tracked Neron’s movements from when he rose out of his chair, rounded the desk, and sat on the front edge. One leg was partially bent, and the other was planted firmly against the ground. He folded his hands on his lap and angled his body toward me, the magnetism of his aura pulling me in by the chest.
“Are you sure you want that, Kiya?” He asked, his voice strained with emotion. “You want me to help you feel good?”
“Yes. I wouldn’t be asking if I didn’t want it.”
He reached toward my hair and spun a curl around his finger. “You must know that I’m not a lax teacher, but I’m not exacting either. I can help you reach the highest forms of pleasure, but you must guide me as much as I guide you.”
“How do I do that?” I asked breathlessly.
“Communicate.” He responded, the curl snapping back in place once released. “When I ask how you’re feeling, you must tell me the truth. If I’m going too fast or too slow, you must let me know. If there is any moment you want me to stop, tell me **immediately**. That’s the only rule I have for you. Bodily responses can be misconstrued, so I expect you to verbally communicate when something doesn’t feel good. Understand?”
Exhaling a breath, I gave him a firm nod. “I understand.”
Neron cupped the back of my neck, caressing the column with his thumb. The pad ghosted over my rapid pulse, drawing an involuntary shiver from me. “Good.” The surrounding aura changed. When I walked in, it was composed and open, but now it clamped around me like a possessive lover, ready to drop me headfirst into ecstasy.
And I *really* liked it.
He swallowed hard, carrying his hand to my cheek. My eyes dipped to his pant zipper, witnessing the great rising pressing against the fabric. I couldn’t differentiate from my cheek heating on its own or Neron’s palm doing it for me.
“Your first lesson will begin in five minutes.” He spoke, grinning from ear-to-ear. “I need to finish up the girls’ documents, so please head to my room and make yourself comfortable. I’ll be there shortly.”
“Wait, we’re starting already?”
“Yes.” He eyed me again. “Are there any objections?”
*Okay, I think I’m going to like Professor Neron*.
“Nope. None.”
“Then, you best be on your way.”
My legs gained a mind of their own and carried me out toward Neron’s room. I was excited to see what was in store, yet nervous for those same reasons. Jiggling the doorknob, I let myself in, shut the door behind me, and hopped on the mattress, shuffling toward the edge.
*Inhale*. *Exhale*. *Inhale*. *Exhale*.
***Would you like it if I was with you during the lesson**?” Artemis asked.
I almost teared up in appreciation. “*Thank you, Art, but I want to do this on my own*. *You don’t need to hold my hand through this*.”
***It’s a habit of mine, Kiki**, **You know this**,.” She chuckled before sighing. Good luck and have fun**. **You know where to find me if you need me**.”
**I love you, Artemis*.”
****Alright**. **
****I love you too, Kiya**.”
Artemis tucked herself behind a wall, leaving me alone. The seconds ticked by as I awaited patiently for Neron’s arrival. Sounds of children and adults alike echoed from the window. barely drowned out by the silent hum of the air-conditioner. Everyone was in their little world, completely oblivious to what their alpha was about to conduct in the privacy of his bedroom.
Two minutes turned to three. Three turned to four. And four turned to five.
Not a second later, I heard the tumbling of the doorknob and the creek of the open door. Heavy steps entered the space, along with the gentle click of a closing door. I didn’t look up, but I was viscerally aware of Neron’s presence dominating the room. The steps grew louder, quieting by a slight margin when they resounded again behind me.
Then, there was the dip in the mattress and a soft kiss pressed against the side of my neck.
“How are you feeling now?” Neron asked me in a whisper.
“Good, just a little nervous.” I answered in a shaky tone. “I’m not sure what to expect.”
“We will not dive right into sex, but we’ll take things slowly.” He explained, cupping my shoulders, and running his hands down my biceps and triceps. “Are you ready?”
“Ready as I’ll ever be.”
“You see that full-length mirror beside my closet?”
Raising my head, I found Neron’s gaze through the reflection. He was on his knees on the mattress behind me, hands secured on my arms in a mix of protection and possession.
“Take off your dress, hand it to me, and stand in front of it.”
“That’s it?” I asked. “You’re not taking my panties like Onyx did?”
“Oh, no.” He laughed, shaking his head. “I’ll return the ones he kept yesterday once I find them.
“Good, because those were my favorite pair.”
“And they’re his favorite pair, too. Now, no more stalling.” He nudged me on my feet. “Go on.”
*Did it just get hot in here or was it me*? *I’m pretty sure it was me*. Steeling my resolve, I stood on my feet and gripped the hem of my brown dress, pulling it over my head. I shivered, not from the cool air, but from scorching eyes following the outline of my form. Once the dress was off, I handed it to Neron. He folded it up and tossed it on his settee.
I was naked aside from my black bralette and underwear. Neron pointed to the mirror with his head, and I stood in front of it. Upon seeing my reflection. I pursed my lips, feeling that miniscule disgust rising again.
“When you look into that mirror, what do you see?”
Confused, I shot my head back at him. “What?”
“What do you see?” Neron repeated.
“Uh…” I turned back at my reflection. “Me?”
“No, Kiya, what do you *really* see?”
“Neron, what’s the point of this?” I inquired, crossing my arms. “Is this even part of the lesson?”
“…This is the lesson.” The alpha readjusted himself on the mattress, sitting on the edge with both elbows propped on either thigh. “Back in Miami, when we kissed in the bathroom, you stopped abruptly. While I know it was too sudden for us to engage in such activities, there was something else that stopped you, right? You say that you don’t know pleasure, but do you believe your body deserved to feel pleasure?”
I bit my bottom lip, lowering my eyes to my feet. How was he able to hit the nail on the head so well? Yes, I didn’t believe this body deserved pleasure, especially not after what it went through. Sexual pleasure, pleasing myself in those same areas that experienced reprehensible violence, was too much for me to handle. My body was a damaged vessel that needed time to recover and that meant avoiding any resemblance to my rapes in order to do so.
Now, it was different. I wanted to embrace my sexual side, but when I look in the mirror, I still see Tristan’s handprints seared into my skin. Overtime, many of those prints faded, but some were still there. Big, nasty, and ugly. I raised my head and cursed myself for the damning tears watering in my eyes.
“Long story short, no.” I answered. “When I look in the mirror, I still see the damage done to me from Tristan. Some days, I don’t see them, but on others, I do. They’re invisible reminders of what happened to me, and only I can see them. All this body has known was violence. Once upon a time, I hated this body and, maybe, a part of me still does.”
*Wow, that was such a mood killer*.
I caught a tear on my finger before it fell, sniffling deeply. Would Neron turn away and stop teaching me? I wouldn’t blame him if he did.
But instead of an outright rejection, his arms encircled my waist, and he pulled me into his chest. I gasped, peering at his reflection in the mirror, noticing his chin resting on top of my head. He kissed my curls and pressed his cheek on my crown, squeezing me gently.